image credit @splashbase

I am human.

I strive to improve.

A little, daily.

Progressing in inches, millimeters even.

Prone to mistakes real and imagined. Fallible. Imperfect.

Just like you. Like everyone.

Prone to mistakes large and small.

Here are 10 HUGE ones I try to avoid.

1. Being dishonest with myself

Honesty within is absolutely vital. White and other coloured lies may be said outside. Perhaps there are justifications for that.

But if lies are told within, it is a HUGE deal.

One’s entire life compass will be lost if this is done continuously.

We all have bearings that keep us steady. And truth (as much as we know it) to ourselves is how we keep progressing.

For many years, I shied away from being honest with myself. It brought alienation and pain. Now, I remind myself to take time out. To reconnect within. To feel my inner truth.

2. Not having a sense of humour

Our sense of humour is a touch of grace we bring to life.

We tread lightly on life when we laugh. Mostly at ourselves.

We are all funny. Our quirks, likes, conditionings and absurdities.

With laughter, we neutralise the angularities and friction. We smoothen our way.

I laugh at the way I can be pompous at times. My “empress” moments. I make fun of it by making funny faces. The lightness of the moment eases inner tension.

3. Sacrificing the present for the future

Life is lived this moment. Always.

There is no life except the present. A succession of NOWs.

Is this a justification for not being disciplined? Is this an argument for abandonment?

Not at all.

Because we understand that life is a succession of NOWs, we create moments that lead to a rich life.

But we don’t “sacrifice” the present moment we now have for a future we don’t yet have.

E.g. we don’t neglect our young children now to build a so-called richer future for them when they are grown up.

We could ask — how then do we achieve our dreams if we don’t sacrifice “X”?

I use this question daily to help define my priorities— What is the best use of my time now that is in alignment with my values and vision?

4. Not managing money well

Why are there people (even celebrities) who make a ton of money and a few years later become broke?

After all, it is good to have money. For bills and a few thrills.

But if you don’t manage the money you have, it will slip through your fingers like sand on a windy beach.

If you don’t manage your money well, the money you make will be used to keep plugging the holes through which money is wasted.

So everyone needs to learn a few basic money management techniques.

Years ago, I found it hard to manage money.

Till I used these 2 basic rules.

Make more money and invest.

Save more money and invest.

Or both.

5. Not taking responsibility for one’s life

A child depends on her parents for everything. And as the years go by, that child would mature and make more decisions and choices for herself.

Even then, many things are beyond our control. Many things are not our fault.

Regardless of that, taking responsibility for our own lives is important. It gives us the power to change things.

When I feel affected by someone’s else’s actions, I try to work out what I can do that will give me the power to act instead of just reacting.

6. Living by default, not by design

This is a natural extension of (5).

If we don’t take responsibility for our own lives, we would be giving control of our destiny to others. We would be living by default.

I choose to live by design. Therefore, I strive to empower myself through the choices and decisions I make for my life. It is easier said than done at times.

But always worthwhile.

7. Taking loved ones for granted

We are harried in our daily lives.

Schedules to keep. Bosses to satisfy. Colleagues to impress.

Be polite, be cool, behave.

To all. Except those nearest and dearest to us?

Not because we mean to be mean. Or thoughtless.

But because we “need” to be nice to everyone else. Because we can often get away with not being that nice to those who love us. And forgive us.

It may be tempting to take our loved ones for granted.

To fail in our courtesies to those we care about most.

Don’t do that. Don’t take your loved ones for granted.

I have made this mistake many times. Too many.

I want to treat my loved ones with at least the courtesy and respect I accord others. To value and appreciate them.

I want them to feel my love and caring. Not ever have to guess at it.

8. Giving up without trying (hard)

If something is worth it, fight for it.

If something is important, strive for it.

Try. Hard.

It would be a mistake to give up easily.

When we try and succeed, it is victory.

When we try and fail, it is feedback.

I remind myself to learn, improve, try again.

9. Neglecting our health

Healthy food, healthy thoughts, healthy emotions.

Restful, plentiful sleep.

Healthy relationships.

These are the cornerstones of our lives. The foundation on which our lives are built on.

Our dreams need them to thrive.

Live with respect. To our health.

Whenever I have neglected my good health through destructive physical, mental, emotional and social habits, I have regretted it.

I cherish my health through healthy practices.

10. Not living life like it’s a precious miracle

You are a miracle. As am I.

A unique creation of the divine.

You are a spark of creativity, love and joy in this brimming cosmos.

Your energy is that which propels the stars and planets.

How dare you live any other way than seeing this as a miracle?

That each of us exists is a wonder in itself.

That we continue to exist spinning lives and dreams and creations is a precious, awe-inspiring miracle.

I choose to live with gratitude for this miracle.

Where attention goes, energy flows.

In being grateful for abundance, more abundance is created.

It would be a HUGE mistake to live life like it is just ordinary.

lat-nayar